Written by Buck E Filbert
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Topics: Nicole Richie

Sunday, 10 June 2007

image for Nicole Richie Enters Convent/Rehab
Sisters of Mercy don't pull punches

Nicole Richie has signed up to enter the, Blessed Angels of Mercy, convent rehab. BAM as it's know to former patients, is probably the toughest rehab on the planet. BAM uses the, ruler across the knuckles, big wooden paddle across the backside method of rehabilitation. Unlike traditional 12 step programs the BAM consolers use the one step program. Stop or be severely beaten.

Insiders say, Nicole has been scared stiff over the recent Paris turn of events and wants to prove herself to any judge hearing her case in the future. Nicole is a little miffed at Paris right now, not only for breaking the privileged snob barrier, the one that shields rich people from incarceration, but leaving her to do the entire promotional tour for the Simple Life 5.

Nicole has been run ragged by personnel appearances on network and cable promotions over the last couple of weeks promoting the new season. Paris gets to sit on her ass, vacationing in county jail.

Nicole was arrested for going south in the northbound lanes of a Los Angeles freeway recently, her court date is nearing.


From the desk of
Buck E Filbert
6/9/07

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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