Written by Buck E Filbert
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Friday, 8 June 2007

image for Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan, Feircely Jealous Over Paris Hilton Coverage.
Britney finds peace at the beach

Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan are fuming mad over all the press and worldwide media attention Paris Hilton's court appearances and subsequent incarceration have garnered.

Sources close to Lindsay Lohan say Lindsay has been firing everyone in her entourage, she's even hiring people just so she can fire them. She is totally jealous over the fact Paris's release has totally eclipsed her latest run in with the law.

Why does that skank always get all the attention? Lindsay asked a girlfriend at a Los Angeles club last night. I got arrested, where all my media?

Sources close to Britney Spears say the reaction from her camp has been similar; these girls compete for the spotlight like pit bulls and Persian kitties. Paris has been eating up the airwaves, she got 9 minutes at the top of the local news last night. She soundly beat out Bush and Putin, why the g5 summit only got a minute.

Paris Hilton is always the groundbreaker, the head of the pack, she makes all these other girls look amateurish in comparison. She manipulates the media like she's playing the piano. Of course, in the land of milk and honey egos run deep. Paris is pulling the wool over all their eyes and that's bound to cause some resentment.

If only Britney and Lindsay would take hold of the reins and steer their own destinies. Maybe a home invasion is called for, or perhaps a drive by would catapult them back into media frenzy.

From the desk of
Buck E Filbert

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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