Written by queen mudder
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Topics: Paris Hilton

Thursday, 7 June 2007

image for War breaks out between Paris Hilton prosecutor and LASD's Sheriff
The LA Prosecutor says no way should Hilton have been released

California - (Ass Mess): Hostilities have broken out tonight between the Los Angeles City Attorney's Office top prosecutor Rocky Balboa and the LASD Sherrif Tommy Lee Barca after blonde socialite Paris Hilton was allowed to duck the rest of her 23 day prison sentence after a few nights' sleep-over on spurious medical grounds.

"Sherrif Barca just caved in this morning after being told Hilton's lawyers had appealed her solitary confinement in Lynwood to the incarceration of unlawful Jihadi combatants in Guantanamo," a spokesman for the Sherrif's department said today.

Meanwhile Prosecutor Balboa was reported to have gone 'ape shit' at the news that yet another celeb has melted the heart of the LA Sherrif Department's top hard man by batting her eyelashes and saying "pretty, pretty please Mr Sherrif!"

"Today's headlines that Hilton was released from Lynwood into house arrest on the grounds that she may be gestating an entity in her womb should be taken with a large pinch of salt," the Prosecutor's office continued, "especially the 'entity' part.

"Knowing her as we do, we think that should read 'non-entity', just like Paris herself."

This is not the first time Balboa and Barca have clashed over the early release of minor celebs.

Recently serial recidivist Michelle Rodriguez turned up for her own jail sleep-over but left after a few hours after Sherrif Barca signed the release form following a promise of autographed nude photos from her attorney.

Another favorite of Sherrif Barca is Blackhawk Down star Tom Sizemore whose penchant for getting arrested over methamphetamine possession has kept Balboa busy and Barca in stitches.

"They keep sending 'em down alright," Barca was heard chortling today, "and I just keep letting them loose again!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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