Written by queen mudder
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Friday, 25 May 2007

image for Borat hires Larry Birkhead's lawyer as Mary Cheney gives mirth to son
Borat Junior takes after his father

Washington DC - (Ass Mess): Kazakhstani actor Mr Borat has hired paternity lawyers who represented Californian photographer Larry Birkhead in his custody suit for Anna Nicole Smith's baby Dannielynn following today's news that Dick Cheney's daughter Mary has had a baby boy.

Borat has been completely unashamed in admitting he was 'around' last August when Mary Cheney was trolling for a sperm donor in e-Bay, MySpace and Facebook in her desperate bid to beat the biological clock and become a mother.

According to depositions filed today Borat supplied the vital sample that impregnated Ms Cheney one hot, sultry afternoon... in an unusual, not-exactly-IVF move more akin to traditional cross-pollination practices favored by birds and bees.

Borat is seeking joint custody and paternal visitation rights.

And as an opening sweetener he has offered to destroy all his uncensored video footage of proud grandpa Dick Cheney whom he filmed incognito during a famous quail-shooting incident that left an elderly attorney riddled with bullets.

That, and the prospect of the lawsuit being heard in a televised Florida courtroom before Judge Larry Seidlin may just give him the weensiest bit of advantage in the paternity proceedings.

Heather Po-face is hopping mad.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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