Middletown, New Jersey - (Ass Mess): Disney's new hardcore porn channel has proved popular in the New Jersey area this week.
Hundreds of thousands of cable customers found that their early morning kids' cartoon slot on Tuesday featuring Handy Manny was in fact a sex health education programme showing just how handy the bilingual Latino Manny Garcia really is with his 'talking tools' and big bosomed girlfriends.
Cable provider Comcast declined to be interviewed on the innovative pilot scheme but feedback from a New Jersey radio phone-in has suggested that at least one hundred thousand under seven year olds now have a grasp of the basic semantics connecting 'talking tools' and fellatio.
A Disney Channel spokesman has said that the event was a one off and there were no immediate plans for a re-run until enough customer feed-back had been analysed by the company's PR division.
However, the New Jersey State Board of Public Futilities which acts as the cable industry's regulator reports that it remains optimistic that the catchy scheme will prove popular in the run up to to 2008 Presidential election and will be keeping a firm grip on the whole thing:
"For us this will be a totally hands-on situation."