Written by matthatt
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Wednesday, 25 April 2007

image for Mills is booted off US dance show, leg stays to go into next round.
Parting is such sweet sorrow.

Heather Mills is a bit miffed to say the least; the poor monoped has been having a tough time of things of late despite her trying to ingratiate herself to the general public by entering arse kicking contests and dancing competitions.

Yesterday came the final straw. The 39-year-old and her dance partner Jonathan Roberts made it to the sixth week of the knock-out competition but have now been told to hop it.

The former fluffer said she was not surprised to be voted off and had a farewell speech hidden inside her jockstrap.

The judges ranked Mills and Roberts fifth out of the seven remaining pairs on Tuesday's show on the ABC network, but she was shocked to hear the surprise announcement that her prosthetic leg was to be sent through to the next round with it's own dancing partner as Ironically, and perhaps not coincidentally, it was her upper rather than her lower body movements that were singled out by the judges as being too wooden.

The next round of the hit TV show Dancing with the Stars, the US version of the BBC's Strictly Come Dancing will have "the leg" busting some moves and throwing shapes with Mickey Rooneys hair piece.

Wiggy and leggy, the prosthetic golden couple will be taking to the floor with a demonstration of Capoeira, a unique Afro-Brazilian blend of dance, acrobatics, music, song and self defence.

Lets cut a rug baby!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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