Written by Shaun Hittle
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Monday, 12 March 2007

image for Anti-Birth Control Activists Cite Possibility of Fifth Baldwin Brother as Reason to Avoid Contraception
Would Hollywood be Bigger with Fifth Baldwin Brother?

The National Anti-birth Control Organization, Bring on the Babies (BOB) has begun its most recent campaign in the streets of Hollywood by citing the possible implications birth control has had on the entertainment world.

The campaign is centered on Hollywood's famous Baldwin family, which boasts four professional actors in its ranks, including Alec, Stephen, Billy, and Daniel.

BOB contends that the use of contraceptives within the Baldwin household after the birth of their last child has hampered the Hollywood community by denying the world the possibility of a fifth acting Baldwin brother.

BOB spokesperson Sandy Anderson, speaking at a Los Angeles pep rally, stated, "Look at the body of work the Baldwin brothers have amassed in their careers. Who knows the possible impact another brother may have had. Its possible he would have surpassed the acting accolades of all his brothers combined, however daunting that may seem. We are left to wonder about the great roles this brother may have played."

The Baldwin family, who have no affiliation with BOB, have declined comment on the controversy.

BOB's campaign is a possible reaction to the Center for Responsible Breeding's 2006 campaign citing the devastating impact of Former First Lady Barbara Bush's decision to eschew birth control during her breeding years.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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