Written by Tom Taylor
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Thursday, 1 March 2007

image for Britney 'Spears' man in hand - Not assault, cry for help

Bald, bad, Britney has struck again, this time injuring a man in what has been described by her publicist as 'a classic cry for help'.

Britney, when approached by misguided, long-time fan Kenny Miller (18) for an autograph, signed a CD for him and then stabbed him in the hand with the pen.

The soiled pen and the signed CD are now involved in a viscous bidding war on ebay.

Several bids from genetic scientists have been entered. One commented: "It's rare to get a volunteer to give over some fleshy tissues to further our scientific field. Since Miller is auctioning his pen through ebay he is waiving certain rights, so we should be able to legally clone him."

Miller did not seem bothered by this, upon hearing the news he reportedly exclaimed: "Cool!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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