Written by Monkey Woods
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Thursday, 1 March 2007

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Ernest will be buried next week

A comedian, who was allegedly the funniest man in Britain, has died aged 65, doing the thing that he did best - laughing.

Ernest Giggles, a distant relative of Chuckle Brother, Barry, collapsed whilst on stage in Barnsley last night, in the middle of his uproariously funny gag entitled "Why did the chicken cross the road?"

Having created a hilarious atmosphere, he wound up to deliver the hysterical punchline and, with the audience in raptures and expecting to hear the funniest thing they had ever heard, Giggles suffered a massive heart attack and expired.

Friends were appalled at his sudden demise.

Joe King, who had known the deceased since they were both in short pants, said:

"He was so funny. When we were little...aw, he was so funny!"

Another aquaintance, Steve Snigger laughed as he recounted some of the dead man's funniest jokes:

"He used to make me laugh so much. Mr Giggles, yeah, he was a funny guy. Always happy, always laughing. He was a laugh-a-minute."

Fellow comedian Tommy Titter, though, was less complimentary, saying:

"Oh yes, he was funny alright. I laughed at him all the time. And at his wife. She had a funny face. I'm glad he's dead."

Giggles will be buried next week in his home town of Sheffield. One of his heroes, and inspiration for much of his material, Jim "Nick Nick" Davidson, will read out one of Giggles' all-time funniest jokes, "How many Irishmen does it take to change a light bulb?" to mourners.

Giggles' widow, Bertha, laughed:

"It's what he would have wanted. He was always laughing."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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