Written by ErHoff
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Topics: Disney, Guantanamo

Wednesday, 28 February 2007

image for New at Epcot: Gitmo World

Orlando Florida - The Disney Company announced today that they were adding a new showcase to their Orlando Epcot Vacation Center with the addition of Gitmo World. Gitmo World has been modeled after the infamous Cuba based American gulag.

Families can drop off unruly children in one of many isolation cells for collection later. One employee dressed as a rodent said it was where BlackWater meets day care.

I interviewed several people what they thought of the new attraction:

Joan of New Jersey: "My kids thought they would play hide the car keys from mom; but 10 minutes of light torture and I had my keys in hand."

Manny from Maryland: "My wife and I had such an enjoyable day, and after we picked our 11 year old son up from the sensory deprivation ride, he was more obedient then ever before."

Salim from Kandahar: "Ah I've been there, did that!"

And it's not just for kids, Martha and her abusive husband checked out Gitmo World last week. When Martha left, her husband was still sitting in a solitary confinement cell. Martha told us: "In the confines of our marriage he was a terrorist. Then my travel agent arranged for my husband to get special treatment. By the time he is released, he will have no recollection of me. I no longer have to fear him. I now recommend Gitmo World to all my friends who suffer bad marriages."

The instant success of Gitmo World has Disney thinking about a scale model of the famous Bamboo Suite at the Hanoi Hilton, but they could neither confirm nor deny anything at press time.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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