Written by Buck E Filbert
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Tuesday, 27 February 2007

image for Celine Dion, Possibly the Whitest Person on Earth
she's so white she could snow blind you

"In regards to Celine Dion's performance on the Academy Awards last night the only thing I can say is, soulless." This was the comment made by Baptist Minister and choir master, Roy Washington after hearing Celine Dion's rendition of, I Knew I Loved You, by legendary film composer, Ennio Morricone

According to RIAA Celine has sold 175 million records world wide and shows no sign of slowing down.

Celine Dion's show in Las Vegas is sold out months in advance. It's SRO every evening. How can this, anti soul phenomenon, be explained?

"Well she did have that one song from Titanic but aside from that I can't think of a single song she's sung, I've never heard one played on the radio." Said music lover, Tom Delancy, "I don't know one person that's bought a DVD of hers. Do you?

A survey done by Wikipedia was recently completed, the results are conclusive, when polled people voted Celine Dion as possibly the whitest woman on earth.

Minister Roy Washington concluded, "I know soul and that woman don't have a bone in her body that's got any. Beautiful range but no heart, no heart at all. Pity, such a waste."

A Baptist choir in Twin Fork, Georgia all agreed, she's white, really super blinding kinda white and she sings like it.

From the desk of
Buck E Filbert
Feb 26 2007

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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