Written by queen mudder
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Tuesday, 20 February 2007

image for Morticians claim Anna Nicole's body has made a new Turin Shroud
"Did the shroud wink at you too?"

Florida - (Rioters): The embalmed body of Playboy centerfold Anna Nicole Smith has startled Fort Lauderdale morticians after a Turin Shroud-like imprint was found festooning the sheet that covered her remains ahead of next week's funeral.

Pathologists who inspected the linen found an exact replica of her hour-glass figure impressing the cloth: "It looks like a pre-Raphelite painting of Mary Magdalene at her entombment", said a lab worker who videoed the image for YouTube.

Some morgue workers who have seen the embalming cloth have told their local pastor that the miraculous image was clearly smiling and even winked a one of them as he took a quick snapshot for the local newspaper:

"We've been ordered to lock up the body on Judge's Orders in case a sightseeing pilgrimage suddenly descends on the facility hoping for the usual miracle wart cures", said Dave MrOrderly.

Meanwhile lawyer Howard K Stern has claimed all intellectual property rights to the shroud ahead of intense movie script discussions with Quentin Tarrantino.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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