Written by Jalapenoman
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Saturday, 17 February 2007

image for Sylvester Stallone Arrested For Smuggling Contraband in Luggage from Australia
Part of the contraband Stallone was attempting to smuggle out of Australia

Sylvester Stallone, best known for movie characters Rocky Balboa and John Rambo, was arrested yesterday at the Sydney airport for attempting to smuggle several items through customs. On the regular luggage search, customs inspectors encountered many contraband items that were seized.

Among the items that were removed from the luggage and trunks were: a kangaroo, two dingos, an aborigine, a crocodile, three koala bears, a wallaby, a family of Tazmanian devils, six boomerangs, the Sydney Opera House, Ayers Rock, the Great Barrier Reef, two strippers from Melbourne, the city of Perth, and the headstone of Steve Irwin (The Crocoodile Hunter).

When asked by airport and customs police why he was attempting to remove these items from the country, Stallone said: "mumble mumble grumble groan mumble yo adrian mumble mumble ya sees, it's like this mumble mumble mumble groan mumble growl mumble Hey Pauli mumble growl growl snarl grumble mumble mumble."

An official interpreter with the Stallone party offered the following translation: "I really enjoyed my time in this country while I was promoting my new fil, Rocky Balboa, and wanted to take home a few souveniers to remind me of this wonderful land. I felt the need to re-create it in my backyard and seriously thought about setting my next Rambo picture in this country. Madonna and Angelina both went to Africa and brought home blacks, so I thought I'd get me one from Australia. I hope that my actions did not offend the good people of Australia and am willing to bribe any goverment officials needed to make this spot on my otherwise perfect record go away."

After taking a few pictures with police and signing a few autographs, Stallone was allowed to take everything but the Great Barrier Reef, Ayers Rock, the headstone, the Sydney Opera House, and Perth back with him. The strippers and the aboriginee were issued tickets in coach and allowed to leave the luggage.

Stallone refused comment to this magazine.

Make Jalapenoman's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 2 plus 2?

9 23 25 4
68 readers are online right now!

Go to top