Written by d howdy
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Topics: Shilpa Shetty

Thursday, 1 February 2007

image for Shock Exclusive - Shilpa Shetty Loves Dirty Dancing
Soon I will be number one...AHA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

It has shocked gossip columnists around the globe but Shilpa's 'dirty' secret is out for the whole world to see.

Shilpa Shetty, Celebrity Big Brother winner and unofficial ambassador against racism loves Dirty Dancing.

Whilst sinking a pint in the Cock and Cavern in London's Holborn I spotted Shilpa Shetty coming out of a theatre (whose name escapes me now) but unmistakenly has the musical Dirty Dancing playing there.

Shetty, 30, was laughing and joking with a mysterious white man with white hair and a jumper covered in 'bobbles'.

I approached her and asked her what she had been doing in the theatre. Looking at me like I was something best left in a toilet, she explained, "Who are you and what business is it of yours?" When I explained that I was a reporter for The Spoof, she said, "The Who? I've never heard of it."

I went on to explain that The Spoof was a spoof website where unemployable writers like myself could write bad articles like this one and still be published.

"Please go away and leave me alone." She said before swanning off with her elderly and rather ugly male friend. "Just a quick word, Miss Shetty, " I called out after her, desperate in my attempt to boost my points ratings score and thus raise my position in the top twenty. Shetty said no more, instead opting to raise her middle finger at me.

I retreated back to the Cock Cavern.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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