Written by Jalapenoman
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Thursday, 1 February 2007

image for Jennifer Aniston Admits to Nose Job
Jennifer's original honker, nose hair and all

Actress Jennifer Aniston admitted today to having once had her nose fixed in plastic surgery. "Sure," she said, "I had a nose job. I'm not ashamed to admit it, either!"

"I was born with a real honker. I mean, it was a Jimmy Durante type Schnozzola. People thought that I had a beak when I was a kid. When I blew my nose, you'd have thought that it was an elephant stampede."

"It was also a really, really hairy nose. The other kids in school would grab on to the hairs (like they were ropes) if I was above them on the monkey bars and use them to climb up. One beautician wanted to charge me extra for doing a perm in my nose."

"My plastic surgeon and electrolosis have made me what I am today, along with the collagen and botox injections, my boob job, my tummy tuck, getting my ears pulled back, butt inserts, chin implants, having my teeth capped, and fixing my bowlegs."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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