Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Monday, 22 January 2007

image for Leonardo DiCaprio Says He's No Piece of Cute Meat
Leo isn't just any piece of meat, and neither is Paris

Disgusted by the teen magazine covers and heart throb status of the 1990's, actor Leonardo DiCaprio stated today that he was not just "a piece of cute meat."

The star of Titanic said, "I am a man. I am not just a picture to be hung on the walls of hormonally challenged teenagers with adolescent crushes, to be fondled in their dreams and at their every whim, or to be squealed about in gym class. I am not a name to be written on junior high notebooks, surrounded by little hearts. My last name is not to be matched with their first names; I don't want to have their babies! I am a serious actor! I was in Gilbert Grape!"

In response to his tirade, Socialite Paris Hilton was heard to say, "I am just a cute piece of meat! Who wants a piece? I'm just a big bucket of the Colonel's Kentucky Fried Chicken! Line up for my legs, breasts, and juicy thighs! I'm finger lickin' good!"

Make Throckmorton Turdblossom's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 4 multiplied by 5?

8 25 20 12
70 readers are online right now!

Go to top