Written by BluntScissors
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Topics: Music, James Brown

Thursday, 11 January 2007

image for Papa's Got A Brand New Box
Mourners watch Mr Brown's funeral light show

James Brown, the Godfather of Soul, who tragically died on Christmas Day 2006, is still innovating right up to his funeral.

Once, the Soul Brother Number One was famed for fusing soul, rock, blues and jazz in a revolutionary way. Now, it turns out that in his will he wanted to introduce a unique feel-good style of burial, complete with a revolving coffin!

He may be no longer be living in America, but Mr Brown will be literally spinning in his grave. The coffin rotates at up to 160 times per minute, and moves in time with his music. The grave is fitted with speakers which will play his greatest hits day and night. A transparent lid will allow viewers to watch his limp body dancing - his arms and legs will appear to move as a result of centrifugal forces.

Let's just hope he doesn't actually Get Up (Like a Sex Machine), because as a corpse his muscles will have decayed and will no longer be able to bear his weight.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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