Written by Fife Peterson
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Topics: Beatles, Antiques

Tuesday, 9 January 2007

image for Lost Beatles Footage Causes A Stir
By Jingo Ringo! The real star is reveiled in 'fab' footage

Lost Footage of the fab four has surfaced in a car boot sale in Peckham, South East London. Bert Trubbins, a bargain hunter from Peckham himself was taking his elderly wife Martha for their usual Sunday hunt for trinkets & tat when he came across the film reel. Curious of the 'Beatles lost footage' label on the tin, Mr. Trubbins, 68 purchased the footage for 50p, later discovering what he had was infact a history changing artifact.

The actual footage shows Ringo Starr teaching John Lennon the chords to hits such as 'Penny Lane' & 'Strawberry fields Forever'. It also shows Starr showing Paul McCartney to do backflips through burning rings of fire. The footage is roughly believed to be from Summer 1967 & is expected to fetch up to £70million at auction.
Paul Smyth-Ponceston of Christies Auction House was suitably excited, "We are all excited here to present this unusual & historic artifact. This will rewrite the history books. We expect the seller to make a profit".

It is unclear why Ringo Starr, real name Richard Starkey would keep secret his song writing credits to this day & all attempts to speak with the former Beatle were unsuccessful today. Paul McCartney was quoted today at his Berkshire home as saying "Ringo was the genius of the band, we just played along, it's all out now. I hope John & George can forgive us for this. It's ruined their legacy".

The auction takes place on February 15th at Christies Auction House. Buyers are asked to bring their spare arms & legs.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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