Top TV celebrity, Noel Edmonds, has today told how his wilderness years caused him to loose some of his best friends.
The tidy-bearded one told The Spoof with tears in his eyes:
"My time out of the spotlight was a nightmare and now I'm a lonely man in many respects. It's cost me a lot in terms of relationships but the worst thing of all is I am no longer mates with Blobby. That's what really hurts.
"We used to go out on the razz every Saturday night after we'd done House Party. You know? Eight pints and the a curry and that's what I miss the most"
We asked Noel if he could elaborate on the reason behind the rift but he just said:
"It's too raw. I don't want to go there at this time"
We tracked down the pink spotted oaf and asked him for his side of the story. He told us:
"Blobby blobby blobby...Blobby blobby blobby...Blobby!"
And then he tried to push our reporter over in his trademark fashion but quite frankly he was shadow of his former self and could hardly manage to unbalance our man. It was so sad to see his pink-spotted rubber suit looking so shabby.
Keith Chegwin a friend of both stars told us:
"This is a tragedy and I wish I could do something to help reunite two of the country's top stars. Just think what they could do if they were back together!"