Written by Gail Farrelly
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this
Topics: Kids, Celebrities

Wednesday, 27 December 2006

image for Celeb Babies "Wind It Up"
Wild and Crazy Partygoers

A playdate escalated into something more when celeb babies got together at a Hollywood home last week.

After drugging their nannies, the babies sampled a bit of the bubbly (well actually it was more than a "bit") and then they began to PARTY. A Spoof reporter knowledgeable in babytalk provided an exclusive report; fortunately she was able to retrieve from the scene a webcam system with audio that had been set up to spy on the nannies. Analysis of the tape shows that wild dancing, ear-piercing music, pleasant chatter and some non-so-pleasant arguments ruled the day.

Shiloh Jolie-Pitt, who spent most of the evening in a liplock with Sean Preston Federline (unlike his famous mom, he WAS wearing underwear), only released her luscious lips long enough to shout a comment when the group started to argue about who had the most famous parent. Shiloh reminded everyone that she had TWO famous parents. "Top that," she screeched. Suri Cruise did, reminding all that she not only had two famous parents, her dad ran a movie studio. "Put that in your pipe and smoke it, with whatever else you're smoking," she snarled at Shiloh.

Shiloh and Suri almost came to blows, and August Hermann (son of Mariska Hargitay) rushed over to separate them. In the process, he mentioned that he not only had a famous parent, but also famous grandparents, blonde bombshell Jayne Mansfield and Mr. Universe Mickey Hargitay. Fortunately some civility reigned in that no one remarked that both grandparents are dead.

Moses Martin (son of Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin) took the opportunity to tell the group that HE had famous grandparents too: Award-winning actress Blythe Danner and the late director Bruce Paltrow. "Besides," he said proudly, "I'm named after one of the most famous characters in religious history." Since some of the partygoers were looking at him rather blankly, he added, "Ever hear of the Ten Commandments, you heathens?"

True Fisher-Duddy, daughter of TV star Joely Fisher, then entered the fray saying, "Let me remind you all that I'm the granddaughter of actress Connie Stevens and singer Eddie Fisher." With that she rushed over to the audio system and stuck in one of her grandfather's CDs. Then she added, "And for your information Carrie 'Star Wars' Fisher is my aunt."

The group actually quieted down for a few minutes while Eddie Fisher's, "Oh My Pa-Pa," was playing. One of the babies whispered to another, "That reminds me, too bad Anna Nicole Smith's little girl couldn't make it." After a few songs, the group got restless and Kingston James Rossdale (son of Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale) crawled over to the audio system and popped in one of his mom's CDs. He was wearing a red plaid kilt and several of the guests were caught on camera trying to peer under the kilt to see what, if anything, he was wearing there.

The party started to wind down when one of the nannies showed signs of emerging from her drug-induced state. Kingston told the group that he would host the next gathering. His parents, he said, have just bought a $15.5 million mansion that once belonged to Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony. He assured everyone that there would be plenty of room, 10,000 square feet. "And," he added with a grin, "considering the former owners, I can promise you great vibes, really great vibes."

As the group broke up, the strains of Gwen Stefani's hit single, "Wind It Up" filled the air.

Make Gail Farrelly's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 5 multiplied by 5?

7 9 5 25

Go to top