Written by Ben Macnair
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Thursday, 14 September 2017

image for Television industry facing national shortage of actors
No, I really don't see Dame Maggie Smith playing me anytime soon

It has been revealed that there is now a national shortage of actors, with only six professionals able to work at the moment (Dame Maggie Smith, Dame Judi Dench, Daniel Craig, that bloke who played Voldermort, David Mitchell and Robert Webb) and so many hours of quality Television still to be made

It was bought up by a man at a red carpet ceremony who said: 'I know all of these faces, they are all I ever see on television, and we award them for wearing expensive clothes, and saying other people's words. Give me someone who has a face I don't know, who has a marital history I don't know, so that I can believe more in the story that they are trying to tell me'.

Mr Terry Vision said: 'Of course, we could always take a risk, and put in a few people who aren't working so much, but obviously we don't know how good they would be, or whether or not the British public would take to them'.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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