Written by K.C. Bell
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Thursday, 11 May 2017

image for Moving Vans Pulling Up In Back Of White House
You're fired.

It wasn't the sound of mid-night footsteps coming down the hall that made Trump itchy for action, oh no, it was the three moving vans that suddenly appeared in the moonlight that caught his eye.

The secret service insisted that there were no moving vans parked in the back drive of the White House, but Trump knew that FBI Director James Comey was getting closer to the Russian connection. Comey even requested more funds to continue and expand his investigation into Trump's Russian connection.

"The son-of-a-bitch wants more money to kick me out of the White House?"

So, Comey was fired.

"You need a reason, boss. Can't say it was because he's getting too close or about the moving vans you keep hearing and seeing at night."

"Okay. Let's say he was rude to Hillary."

"Check. Should we say: rude to Hillary, or rude to Lock Her Up Hillary?"

Initially, they planned to tweet Director Comey's dismissal, however, the gang that couldn't govern straight, decided to send a letter instead. Formality was important.

After the letter was type up and cleared through spell-check twice, "Those god damn homonyms trick us up every time. Make sure you write - hereby - somewhere in the letter, and don't spell it hearby."

There then followed the debate on whether to mail the dismissal letter, hand deliver it or to send it by Fed Ex. Sending it Fed Ex would demonstrates their patriotism and loyalty to a branch of the government.

"And make sure to mention that I was okay with Comey assuring me once, no make it twice, no, let's make it three times that he already cleared me of any Russian connections, so it doesn't seem as though Comey's dismissal has anything to do with the Russian connection, election fraud, the Moscow Ritz Carlton, sanctions, Putin, money laundering, wikileaks, Julian Assange, hacking into the DNC, MI5 Christopher Steele and his dossier."

The dismissal letter was hand delivered.

Director Comey was in Los Angeles, presenting a recruitment speech, when television screens in the room announced his dismissal.

It isn't clear whether his recruitment was successful.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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