Complete pandemonium at 'The Marie Dubois Infants School' in London's trendy Notting Hill and it's all over who's to play Mary in the upcoming version of the Nativity Play entitled "Yo Jezza Dude!"
The £3,000,000 a week school, famous for having an abnormally high amount of show business mums and dads, is embroiled in a power struggle between Apple Martin and Lourdes Madonna Ritchie
The Spoof understands that at present little Apple has the coveted role but she's facing a stiff challenge.
Madonna (Ciconne) is believed to have serious Mafia connections with a name like that, and if Chris Martin, Apple's multi-million record selling dad doesn't get her to change her mind and maybe play a sheep or something, then The Spoof expects that it's not Gwyneth Paltrow he'll be waking up to...capice my friend? Eh? No? Yes? Ha ha ha!
Meantime rehearsals continue apace with the only confirmed big name in the cast being Wee Jimmy Krankie who is going to play Joseph.
This will be Krankie's swansong in the part as he will turn 11 in January but Madame Dubois is not unduly worried as it's believed that talks with Norman Wisdom's agent are at an advanced stage for next year.