Written by Paul Blake
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Monday, 27 April 2015

image for Diane "Duane" Sawyer Also Outed At Big Jenner Interview."
Diane Sawyer knows a thing or two about having a huge schlong.

Malibu, CA - Production Assistant, Alicia Glitz, was just trying to scratch her way up to the mid-level ranks of the hair and make-up department, in the dog-eat-dog entertainment industry, when she scored a job on the big Bruce Jenner interview, with legendary anchor woman Diane Sawyer. Now Alicia claims to have cell-phone footage of Diane Sawyer, outing herself to Bruce Jenner, right after their big primetime sit-down. Then, the two man-babes gab on about training hard to try and make the Senior LPGA Tour together, in honor of Payne Stewart, a golf legend who died too young - and also enjoyed cross-dressing an awful lot.

Alicia explained: "I think she (Diane) hated the idea of being one upped at the interview, and just said it to set Bruce straight. Then they got talking about golf and it goes on forever. It was blah, blah, blah about drivers and pitching wedges for like over a half an hour. The entire crew was completely packed and gone and they were still sitting there, yackity- yack about the fricken twelfth hole of the Master's - what ever the hell that is!"

Indeed, when you slow the cellphone tape down and re-listen to it, the reference of Diane outing herself is only but a brief few seconds near the beginning, when you can clearly hear Diane say casually: "Don't worry Bruce. I know all about having a huge donkey cock - I used to be Duane-." It's plain as day - then straight back into her putting stance, and what she'd learned from watching Jordan Spieth on the back nine at the Master's this year."

"Yeah, frick, they were really into golf-" surrendered our new snoopy gossip hound, Alicia, "It was Master's, Master's, Master's. I just left my phone right there on the table and let it play 'til it ran out of batteries. But she never mentions being a man-babe again."

So look out, Senior Ladies Professional Golf Tour - looks like you've got two stone-cold hotties coming your way, each with the determination of Princess Leia, to honor the legend of Miss Payne Stewart.

Note: Mrs. Sawyer's representatives had no comment when phoned. And Alicia Glitz would like to have any hair and make-up professionals contact her through her FB account regarding jobs, or follow her on Twitter @ #snoopyhairbitch.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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