Written by D P Whitehead
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Topics: Shia LaBeouf, cunt

Friday, 26 September 2014

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American actor and director Shia LaBeouf announced today that he would like to apologize to the whole world for being a total and utter cunt, and acknowledges that he is in fact a complete tool and deserves "a dam good hiding".

LeBeouf, who is 28, who many of you have probably not heard of, is the weedy little attention grabbing twat who acts like a spoiled little turd - he was also in Transformers.

In a long drawn out statement, which LaBeouf released early Friday, he apologized for a range of actions and controversies including arrests, plagiarism but more importantly "being that annoying guy that most people just want to punch in the head the moment they set eyes on him."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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