Written by D P Whitehead
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Monday, 5 May 2014

image for Betty White, Joan Rivers and Larry King Neck and Neck In Office Death Pool
Could Clint Eastwood Be An Outside Bet?

Things are hotting up in a South Florida offices' 'death pool' after new member of staff, Kevin Ball wagered $200 on former Golden Girl Betty White to pip current favorites Joan Rivers and Larry King to the grave.

"I feel good about Betty's prospects in this competitive graveyard race," said Kevin. "She is largely incoherent and responds poorly to finnishing her lines in that utterly deploarble show "Hot In Cleveland."

Despite White's rapidly deteriorating acting skills, those with money on King and Rivers remain confident.

"Apart from one or two public appearances in the past year, Larry King has been unable to function in any meaningful capacity outside his sitting at a desk, with a coffee cup on it," said John Giles, who has $25 riding on King.

Rivers, meanwhile, is proving a strong contender with a progressive mental disorder eroding her comedy skills and her recent melting incident, posted on youtube, which showed her dripping while in the sun; has Liz Cooper confident that she will kick the bucket first.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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