Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Wednesday, 2 April 2014

image for Chelsea Handler's Talk Show Will Not Be Renewed
Chelsea Handler as she appeared in her high school yearbook.

LOS ANGELES - The E Network has just informed the public that after eight years on the air, they will not be renewing Chelsea Handler's talk show, Chelsea Lately.

A spokesperson for the network stated that there were several reasons why the decision was made to terminate Handler's stay at the E.

One was that they felt that, at 39, the dishwater blonde has just gotten a little long in the tooth, and they are hoping to replace her with a much younger, nicer, and prettier woman.

An inside source said that Jennifer Lawrence's name is one that has been tossed around.

The network spokesperson also pointed out that the network had received way too many complaints from viewers saying that Handler has one of the nastiest, foulest, most vulgar mouths they have ever seen.

One viewer from Kalamazoo, Michigan said that she is 87, and Handler mentioned some dirty words that she had not heard since she was at boarding school back in 1943.

SIDENOTE: An unnamed source said that when Chelsea was told of the cancellation she paused for a moment and then let fly about a dozen or so horrible expletives that cannot be printed here.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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