Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Saturday, 29 March 2014

image for Justin Bieber's Mom, Pattie Mallette, Has Checked Herself Into The Henry & Betty Ford Rehab Clinic
A photo of Pattie Mallette and an unidentified male hand.

LOS ANGELES - Well it appears that Justin Bieber has done it. The spoiled child of Pattie Mallette has just caused her to check herself into The Henry & Betty Ford Rehab Clinic.

A source close to Mrs. Mallette stated that Pattie reached the point where she could just not take anymore of her immature son's childish antics.

The insider commented that Pattie has been so worried about the whole mess that she started losing some pubic hair which is very, very rare.

She has also been suffering from bulimia, melancholia, and lack of mattress merriment.

But the last straw was when her wacky pop singer son told Vice-President Biden that if he convinced President Obama to drop the deportation proceedings that he would arrange for him (Biden) to go out on a date with his sexy 37-year-old mom.

The fast lane Canadian kid quickly received a text message from Mrs. Joe Biden (Jill) letting him know in no uncertain terms that he is about as friggin fruity as a Corsicana Fruit Cake and she will personally speak to the president about getting him to speed up the deportation issue.

Meanwhile, Mrs. Mallette was so embarrassed she told her son that when she gets out of rehab, she may just decide to move to the Ukraine in order to get some peace and quiet.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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