Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Monday, 17 March 2014

image for John Mayer and Kristen Stewart Spotted Engaged In A Bit of Tongue Hockey At The La Brea Tar Pits
A statue of a miner holding up a piece of tar from The La Brea Tar Pits.

LA BREA - Well by all accounts it certainly looks like it did not take John "The Player" Mayer long to get over his breakup with Katy "Tatas" Perry.

A source revealed to Bedroom Pillow Talk that Mayer and Kristen Stewart were seen in Mayer's BMW rollicking about in a bout of tongue hockey.

K-Stew, who is known as Princess Smirk, emerged from the car at one point to light up a cigarette.

She quickly got back in the car and went right back to the romantic business at hand.

The source said that she was actually able to see Johnny get to second base. The observant source said that she had to leave after Mayer got to third base so that she would not be late for work.

Bedroom Pillow Talk will stay with the John Mayer-Kristen Stewart story and bring you any new developments as they develop.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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