Written by D P Whitehead
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Monday, 3 March 2014

image for With World War 3 Looming The Big Question Still Remains - Did Ellen DeGeneres Pocket Pizza Man's Tip?
Mushroom Cloud or Ham and Mushrooms?

As tension mounts in the Crimea Peninsula, with Russia threatening to attack Ukraine forces if they do not surrender, the world holds it breath to see if the $500 tip collected by Oscar host Ellen DeGeneres from a host of Hollywood stars actually gets to the man who delivered the pizza.

"I am extremely anxious," said one woman "I just hope she doesn't steal that poor boy's tip."

As war looms in Europe, with talk of possible nuclear escalation, Brad Pitt tweeted "Ellen - Hand Over the Cash!"

Other stars have expressed their concern at recent world events, stating "It is appalling" and "A tragedy" - all referring to the disputed tip.

In other news, after his 15 minutes of fame, pizza delivery man, Edgar, was deported after it was discovered he had no legal right to work or live in the United States.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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