Written by D P Whitehead
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Monday, 3 March 2014

image for John Travolta, Kim Novak and Goldie Hawn Cause Melting Chaos At Oscars
Goldie Hawn Heads Home

Last nights Oscar Ceremony ended in chaos after several high profile actors melted backstage, resulting in pools of molten plastic and the early end of the ceremony.

Due to the excessive heat of stage lights and so much plastic surgery, several stars, including John Travolta, Kim Novak and Goldie Hawn literally melted, their faces resembling drenched clowns as their false faces erupted.

The show, hosted by a young man with blond hair and a high pitched voice was ordered to rush the ceremony as fire crews worked furiously backstage to prevent the plastic from igniting.

LA Fire Chief John Upson told reporters "If Mickey Rourke had been there, well, the whole place would have gone up in flames."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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