MAGNOLIA, Arkansas - Former comedian Gilbert Gottfried has said that he never realized that he could have been so dumb, so stupid, and so utterly ignorant as to try and make a joke out of the devastating Japanese tsunami of 2010.
Gottfried's joke was so insensitively cruel that it cannot be repeated in a family publication or even in a Nazi publication for that matter.
The comedian who was rolling in the dough is now mowing laws in Magnolia, Arkansas.
He had originally moved to Santa Fe, New Mexico, but the citizens of that town told him that they hated the hell out of his horrible whining voice and they made him move out of the city.
Gottfried then moved to Tulsa, Oklahoma, and within three days the townspeople took up a petition saying that he was much too ugly to live in their town.
And so Gilbert moved yet again, this time ending up in the little town of Magnolia, Arkansas, home of the Out Yonder Outhouse Company.
Since Gottfried lives way out in the backwoods, about 6 miles from his nearest neighbors, nobody has really complained about his ridiculously irksome-as-hell voice (yet).
SIDENOTE: Gottfried says that if things do not work out in Magnolia, he may just decide to leave the USA and move down to some remote banana plantation in Costa Rica.