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Saturday, 15 February 2014

image for F.B.I. Cracks Down On Rock and Roll Copy Cat Groups
a crowd of happy, but gullible fans anticipating "The Beatles"

CLEVELAND, OHIO - The Federal Bureau of Investigation held a news conference at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in Cleveland today. F.B.I. Agent, LeVoy Crandall, of the Intellectual Property Theft Division, announced that they will begin cracking down on Rock and Roll copy cat groups.

"We are hearing reports throughout the U.S., particularly from rural America, that these copy cat groups are billing themselves into small town events, clubs, rodeos, and country fairs in a deceptive manner. They are fooling people into paying exorbitant prices for a show that is not authentic, but by the time the customer realizes it, they are out their money."

When asked for an example, Agent Crandall cited several examples. "Take a motor home sales event that happened in rural North Dakota last summer. The copycat group, hired as entertainment, promoted themselves as 'The Beagles' and sort of smeared the 'g' to resemble a 't' on their posters. What a huge let-down for all the aging Baby Boomer fans who came from miles around just to see the 'Fab Four'."

"Then there was a female act, 'Diana Rost and the Streams'," continued Crandall, "who advertised themselves as the #1 Motown girl's group of all-time in order to book a balloon festival at Lake Havasu. Turns out they weren't even African American!"

According to Crandall, "Another fraud act, Simone and Garfinkle, were booked for the Chattanooga Dog Show. In this case, Simone was a six foot tall Lithuanian soprano, and Garfinkle was a 5 foot tall British alto. When they started covering 'Sounds of Silence', the audience was anything but!"

Crandall concluded the press conference with this warning, "Intellectual Property Theft is prosecutable. The F.B.I. will be sending undercover agents, dressed like country bumpkins, foreign tourists, and elderly people, out to rural American venues this summer. We are going to crack down on these malicious and fictitious rock and roll groups that have been preying on our vulnerable citizens. We will be out there in the audience, you can be sure of that!"

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