After the Supreme Leader's birthday bash he looked glum. Even his extensive collection of porn couldn't cheer him up or his nail lady, Yum Sweet Delight. Now it turns out that the fur coat given to him by Mr. Rodman on his birthday wasn't what he wanted at all
What leader Um wanted were a chest full of medals on his drab uniform. Um's hairdresser, Wan Tongue Wow, revealed to this reporter that Kim Jung, before his birthday party, virtually told Rodman what gift to give him.
"Why Dennis is so thick, i don't know," said Ms. Wow.
"The supreme leader repeatedly told the basketball man how much he admired all of the military medals worn by Egyptian strongman, General Abdul-Fattah el- Sisi. Our supreme leader Um has never been to war and neither has General Sisi."
"So Kim jung was always talking about those medals to Dennis, telling him that you didn't need to see combat to justify wearing them," said the hairdresser.
"Dumb Dennis. Kim Jong kept telling him how much he loved those medal how much he had in common with SIsi - how brutal and repressive they both were and so on. But Rodman couldn't take the hint. I don't think the supreme leader will ever talk to him again. He hasn't been returning Dennis' phone calls or text messages for five days now," she told me.
"You know, he really does love the basket ball man but he feels totally betrayed. I've tried everything to cheer him up but nothing works. I suppose his depression will turn to rage. It usually does. I wish he didn't have those missiles to play with."