Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Friday, 20 December 2013

image for Justin Bieber Tells Piers Morgan That He's Hanging Up His Microphone
Justin confessed that he thought long and hard about hanging up his microphone.

NEW YORK CITY - The Canadian pop singer and hip hop wannabe Justin Bieber appeared on Tonight With Piers Morgan.

The highly troubled singer told Morgan that all of the recent headline stories he has made have finally taken a toll on him.

He said that all of the adverse publicity has affected him physically, mentally, emotionally, romantically, and geographically.

Bieber said that he also places a lot of the blame on his ex-girlfriend Selena Gomez who dumped his butt and basically tossed him to the curb like an old discarded sofa.

Piers asked if he knew that he had been acting like a total bloody, blithering, blimey buffoon.

Justin nodded his head and asked what blimey meant.

"Nevermind little bloke" Morgan replied.

Piers continued, "So then tell me Sofa Boy, does this mean that you are going to change the obnoxiously repulsive manner in which you have been conducting yourself of late?"

Bieber got a puzzled look on his face and replied that he plans on hanging up his microphone and retiring from the music business.

Morgan told him that it sounded like a wise idea seeing as how he had basically turned himself into a walking time bomb.

Piers added that other than the Lindsay Lohan he had never ever really seen anyone so hell-bent on self-destruction than himself.

SIDENOTE: As the interview ended, Morgan told Bieber that he really needs to see a therapist about why he is always touching his crotch seeing as how he really isn't black no matter what he may think in his little warped mind.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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