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Wednesday, 4 December 2013

image for Tom Cruise has sense of smell removed; science says, "Smell is effeminate."
Hollywood, CA: Where men are meh-n

HOLLYWOOD, CA - Actor, producer, and World-renowned movie star Tom Cruise underwent a rare elective surgery last Thursday at Cedar Sinai in Los Angeles. Mr. Cruise had his sense of smell removed; this comes after the National Science Foundation most recent study determined the sense of smell as the most feminine of the 5 senses. Industry reps say Mr. Cruise is trying to "ALPHA-UP" his image for an upcoming film.

The NSF conducted a yearlong study comparing masculine and feminine traits with each of the 5 senses. Subjects were monitored by a group of scientists as they continued daily life without one of their major abilities. Final results determined that smell is the most feminine of the senses; 2/3rds of the men did not notice the loss of the sense. Hearing was determined the 2nd most feminine sense, sight was the most masculine.

When reached for comment, ex-wife and actress, Katie Holmes stated, "Tom does not like having sex with men."

Elective surgery for male stars continues to be on the rise in Hollywood. In the past year, four different stars have publically confirmed undergoing elective procedures including Sylvester Stallone's eyebrow enhancement and Will Smith's street cred injections.

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