Written by Wire Piddle

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Wednesday, 27 November 2013

image for Barbra Streisand, Aging Songstress, Believes People Are Overrated
Satan's Little Soother

LOS ANGELES - Behind heavily fortified fencing and along the shark infested waters in Malibu, aging singer, Barbra Streisand, the lady that sang the phrase 'People, who need other people, are the luckiest people in the world', now believes people are overrated because when you look at people as individuals, the vast majority are useless bags of carbon matter just taking up space.

"Seriously. Have you ever taken a look at the vast majority of the population? If they really needed people, what are they doing walking around with ipods on listening to me sing, "People, who need other....people, are the luckiest people....in the world."

"They're not seriously looking for people relationships. They're looking for the promise of people relationships. Trust me. Very few of them take off their ipod buds and actually make the next step. And when they do make the next step, what do they talk about? Their ipods. Idiots!"

"And this new Apple headquarters. Looks like a hemorrhoid disc. But don't get me started. You know I can't stop when I get started. Oy Vey."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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