Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Sunday, 20 October 2013

image for Crocodile Dundee Is Getting Divorced
Paul Hogan's pet crocodile which he named "Snowflake" after Sarah Palin.

NEW YORK CITY - Word has reached the Big Apple that the rugged actor who starred in the Crocodile Dundee movies is headed for Divorce City.

Paul Hogan, 74, has just learned that his wife of 23 years, Linda Kozlowski, 54, wants out of their May-December marriage and has filed divorce papers on grounds of Facto Ipsalanto Crocalante.

To the average American this term is foreign but to anyone living down under (in Australia) they recognize this as a man's desire to spend a lot of his time hunting crocodiles in the outback marshes.

An expert on Australian marriages Dr. Conrad C. Chamberlain, 85, recenlty told American Spotlight Magazine that 19 percent of all Australian marriages end in divorce on grounds of Facto Ipsalanto Crocalante.

SIDENOTE: A close friend of Linda's identified as Valerie "Knockers" Shumberry told American Spotlight Magazine reporter Cutter Shiloh that Linda never got over the fact that she was branded a homewrecker and a hussy by many in the entertainment media when she married Hogan in 1990.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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