Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Friday, 20 September 2013

image for Demi Moore Admits She Has Had Her Fill of Boy Toys
Demi said that she spends thousands of dollars a year on Cellulite-Be-Gone Cream.

HOLLYWOOD - Demi Moore, who for the past year has refused to give Ashton Kutcher a divorce so that he can marry his girlfriend the erotically sexy Mila Kunis, has had a change of heart.

She spoke with Ersatz Pontoon of Hollywood Hors D'oeuvres and said that she is still not going to give her boy-toy husband Ashton Kutcher a divorce. But she did reveal that she has decided to stop having relationships with boy toys.

Demi who is considered by many to be Tinsel Town's most notorious cougar said that she is tired of being involved in May-December relationships with young men who cannot even name all four of the Beatles.

Moore said that she has had several talks with her ex-husband Bruce Willis and he has told her that she really needs to stop messing around with kids and start dating mature men who know exactly where her G-spot is located without having to Mapquest it.

Demi told Pontoon that twice in the past year she has actually had young suitors ask her what in the world is that on her thighs.

The G.I. Jane star replied that it was cellulite. She said one asked her what in the world had bit her to give her such ugly looking scars.

In A Related Story. All three of Demi's daughters, Rumer, Scout, and Tallulah are thrilled that their mother has finally decided to date guys who are in her age range.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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