Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Saturday, 10 August 2013

image for Sharon Osbourne Fires Both Barrels At Justin Bieber
Sharon Osbourne says that Justin needs to check into The Henry & Betty Ford Rehab Clinic as soon as possible.

HOLLYWOOD - Sharon Osbourne has never been one to hold back her feelings and she recently let them be known when the subject of Justin Bieber came up.

The wife of Rock and Roll's Prince of Darkness, Ozzy Osbourne, had just finished her dinner at Beverly Hills swank Posh Pelican Restaurant when she was approached by Carolina Chipotle with Bedroom Pillow Talk.

Miss Chipotle asked Osbourne how things were going with her intimate female problems.

Osbourne smiled and replied that she was feeling much better after having gone in for a little love harbor tuck.

The former America's Got Talent judge said that it was her second in 10 years and this one seems to be holding up nicely (no pun intended).

She was asked what she thought about the way Justin Bieber has been acting lately. Sharon shook her head and remarked that it he was her son she would finish pulling his low-hanging pants down and spank the bejeebers out of the lad.

Osborne said that Justin tries so hard to act like a bad ass but that is next to impossible since he's just a candy ass.

She said that his so called mean demeanor is so fake because the little Canadian boy looks about as menacing as a new born baby duckling.

Mrs. Osbourne then stated, "Ya know Chippy, I wonder just how tough the little munchkin would be if he didn't have his half dozen bodyguards around him ready to pounce on anyone who gets within six feet of him?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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