Written by Sam Sage
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Topics: Will.i.am

Tuesday, 30 July 2013

image for Will.I.Am Just Wants To Be Taken Seriously
Will.I.Am: A Modern Day Shakespeare.

Will.I.Am of The Black Eyed Peas has recently stated that the song 'I Gotta Feeling' isn't just a generic and uninspired pop record, but is actually a meaningful, emotive song about the Bosnian Genocide which people have completely misunderstood.

In a press release he stated, "For the last time. That song isn't about having a good time and partying, it's obviously about the massacre of the thousands of innocents during the Bosnian War. It annoys me that people can't see that and when the song comes on they just dance and scream and get their breasts out. I don't want them to dance with their breasts out; I want them to think with their breasts out. Possibly their vaginas too."

"The lyrics "Let's do it, let's do it, let's do it, do it, do it, do it" and "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday/ Do it/ Friday, Saturday, Saturday to Sunday/ Do it" are about the brutal extermination of men, women and children and the day to day sufferings of these individuals. It's called a metaphor people!"

Mr. I.Am also stated that the song 'My Humps' was about the Crimean War and 'Boom Boom Pow' was about the political state of Sudan.

He said that a lot of influences came from the existentialist philosophies of Nietzsche and Satre, and his song writing has been changed since he became a fan of Byron - his lyrics have taken a much more poetic nature featuring passionate and tragic heroes, such as in the song 'Imma Be'.

The eponymous Be is a flawed, rebellious hero desperately trying to break out of the constraints of society whilst arrogantly bragging about his infamy to potential suitors: "Imma be up in them A-list flicks", "Imma be chillin' with my mutha mutha crew", "Imma be takin them pics, lookin' all fly and shit", "Imma, Imma be, Imma be fuckin' her". Simply beautiful.

Mr I.Am told a reporter, "You know, right now I hate all this 'pop music' nonsense. Why can't people see through this obvious ironic fa├žade? I enjoy nothing more than sitting in front of a fire, with a snifter of brandy, reading a good novel."

Will.I.Am's newest album "Willpower", is purportedly inspired by religion, mainly the theological discrepancies between Hinduism and Taoism.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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