Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Monday, 29 July 2013

image for Justin Bieber Receives A Message About His Spitting From Mafia Boss Salvatore Goombalini
Sal has an extensive bullet collection that numbers somewhere around 19,000. (Photo courtesy of Garbanzo Goombalini).

BROOKLYN - Salvatore Goombalini, head of one of New York's biggest crime family's, has heard about Justin Bieber's penchant for going around spitting on people.

In the latest of half a dozen saliva incidents, Bieber stood on a hotel balcony and spit on fans that had gathered 27 stories below.

Sal who is the oldest of ten brothers says that spitting on someone is the nastiest, vilest, most vulgar thing one person can do to another.

The infamous Mafioso sent Bieber a message telling him a story about a young punk he knew from the Bronx who was 19; the same age as Justin.

Sal said that the jerk named Giovanni "Spitboy" Mozzarella also had the nasty habit of going around spitting on people. Well one day, Giovanni spit on a 97-year-old lady who used to bake cookies for Sal and his brothers.

Later that afternoon Giovanni's tongue mysteriously fell off. After that Spitboy never spat on another person again.

SIDENOTE: Reports are that Justin has apologized profusely to Mr. Goombalini for spitting on people and he promises that he will never, ever spit on another person again.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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