Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Friday, 5 July 2013

image for Kirstie Alley Addresses Chelsea Handler's Cupcake Addiction Comment
Kirstie says that contrary to what the evil demon Chelsea Handler said she is not addicted to cupcakes.

LOS ANGELES - Kirstie Alley has made it very clear that she cannot stand that skanky dishwater blonde talk show host Chelsea Handler.

Alley recently appeared on The Viagra View and told Larry King that Handler is without a doubt the most evil, hateful, conceited yo ho that she has ever known.

King asked Alley what she meant by a yo ho and she answered that a yo ho is a white woman who tries to act like she's black so that she can appear cool to the bruthas and thus get them to ask her out.

Ryan Seacrest who knows a lot about a lot of celebrities said that the percentage of Chelsea's dates who are black is right at 91 percent.

In fact, one of her black dates identified as Tydarius Muggins referred to her as the white version of Omarosa.

Handler, who is 38, but looks 48, recently mentioned on her show that in a cupcake eating contest between Kirstie Alley and John Goodman she would have to bet on Kirstie since she heard that the big mama is addicted to cupcakes.

Word got back to Alley who said that Handler can kiss her badonkadonk and then afterwards move around to her pink playpen.

She further added that it would not hurt the Nicki Minaj-looking clown to look in the mirror and think about trying to do something about her split ends, her overgrown eyebrows, and her circus elephant ears.

Kirstie said that she is not addicted to cupcakes and if Handler dares to mention it again she is going to buy a dozen cupcakes and feed them to her by way of her ears.

SIDENOTE: Michelle Obama has stated on many occasions that she has asked her husband to see about possibly having the potty-mouthed, disruptive element known as Chelsea Handler deported.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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