Written by Abel Rodriguez
Print this

Monday, 1 July 2013

image for Brad Pitt Tells Angelina Jolie To Stop Texting That Loser Billy Bob Thornton Or The Engagement Is Off
Billy Bob Thornton reportedly keeps several magic 8 balls scattered throughout his home.

NEW YORK CITY - Brad Pitt has reportedly had enough of Billy Bob Thornton and his hidden agenda of trying to break him and Angelina up.

Pitt told Tittle Tattle Tonight's Tapioca Swizzle that he is also fed up with Angelina texting the wormy-looking loser and he has let her know that if she persists he will break off the engagement.

Miss Swizzle noted that Thornton still has lots of deep-rooted intimate feelings for the big-lipped actress who stole Pitt away from his wife Jennifer Aniston back in 2005.

Thornton and Jolie had a very weird relationship that was filled with the world of the occult, evil spells, blood vials, Chinese symbol tattoos, voodoo magic, and Tea Bag politics.

Billy Bob is best remembered for pretty much nothing. But he is noted for being about 13 cards short of a full deck.

President Obama has called him, "One troll-looking, funky weasel."

Miss Swizzle pointed out that the only thing Billy Slob, as Vice-President Joe Biden refers to him, has going for him is the gift of BS.

She revealed that Thornton is a disciple of the school of thought that states that if you can't dazzle them with brillance, baffle them will bullsh*t, and when it comes to that Billy Bob has a Master's Degree.

Make Abel Rodriguez's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 5 multiplied by 3?

1 14 15 12
74 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more