Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 2 July 2013

image for OctoMom AKA Nadya Suleman Shocked At The Reason Why She Was Banned From Appearing On Dancing With The Stars
Nadya has said that after her octuplets were born she went from a C-Cup to a DD-Cup. (Photo courtesy of Ashton Kutcher).

LA HABRA, California - Nadya Suleman recently appeared on The Viagra View and told Regis Philbin that there aren't very many women in the entire USA who have 14 kids and who have managed to take all of the criticism that she has had to endure from people from all walks of life.

She said that she has been called all kinds of unflattering names such as The Countess of Conception, The Ronco Baby Machine, and The Walking Womb.

Suleman said that she hates being on food stamps and that is precisely the reason why she made that infamous sex video.

Regis asked her if she had a boyfriend. Nadya blushed and said that she had one but the 14 kids kinda caused him to head for the hills as Roy Rogers used to say in his Old West movies.

Nadya did reveal that two weeks ago she received an email from Russell Brand saying that he would like to take her out on a date to the La Brea Tar Pits.

She turned him down.

"Why?" Philbin asked quite surprised.

Octomom looked down at her blue miniskirt and replied that she rejected him because she cannot understand his Brazilian accent.

When told that Brand was from Britain, she paused for a moment and then asked, "Okay, so if he's from Britain and Britain is in Africa then he speaks with an African accent?"

SIDENOTE: Nadya mentioned to Regis that she wanted to appear on the next edition of Dancing With The Stars but was told by the shows executives that her boobs are way too big. She commented that she was shocked but realized that she could have ended up seriously hurting her male partner.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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