Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Thursday, 9 May 2013

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Madonna cannot accept the fact that she is going down the music hill at a very high rate of speed.

MANHATTAN - Madonna is 54-years-old and a close source has revealed that she is having some trouble coping with the fact that she is no longer musically relevant.

The Michigan native is very upset at the fact that she has not had a Top 40 song since 2005's "Hung Up."

The woman who was born Madonna Louise Ciccone writes it off by saying that she is still as fantastically gifted as always and that it is the fans who have become fickle.

She goes on to say that proof of the fans' fickleness is the fact that they are turning to secondary artists such as Ke$ha, Taylor Momsen, and Karly Rae Jepsen, the 26-year-old Canadian singer who wears bangs that are more appropriate on a 6-year-old girl.

Madonna has said that she will continue to give at least 91 percent to her music and to her performing ability.

FOX News recently reported that perhaps La Madonna needs to face Mother Nature and go on a Madonna The Material Grandmother Farewell Concert Tour.

The "Papa Don't Preach" singer became highly upset and stated that she would not watch FOX News if they paid her $18 a minute to watch it.

SIDENOTE: Comedian Joan Rivers, who is known as The Undisputed Queen of Mean, recently commented on Larry King and Regis Philbin's The Viagra View that Maddy (Madonna) needs to just look in the mirror and see that her David Letterman gap tooth has gotten so big that she can now easily eat a hot dog wiener without opening her mouth.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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