Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 7 May 2013

image for The Here Comes Honey Boo Boo Cinco de Mayo Wedding
Rev. Burdette Brickbox joking around at The Shannon-Thompson wedding. (Photo courtesy of Fajita San Guacamole).

MCINTYRE, Georgia - The little Georgia town of McIntyre was the site of one of the biggest celebrations in the town's history.

Alana Thompson AKA Honey Boo Boo, star of the reality show, Here Comes Honey Boo Boo, said her daddy Mike "Sugar Bear" Thompson had finally popped the marital question to her mom June "Mama" Shannon.

The pint-sized beauty pageant princess spoke with Fajita San Guacamole a reporter with Hollywood Innuendo and told her that she was as happy as a stripper at a billionaire's convention.

Miss San Guacamole was the only member of the entertainment media to be allowed at the wedding.

Honey Boo Boo said that when her dad first asked her mom to be his wife, June (Shannon) started jumping up and down so fast she accidentally knocked over grandbaby Kaitlyn's bassinet, but luckily little Kaitlyn was not hurt since she landed on her great uncle Marvy Lee Thompson, who goes by the gay name of Uncle Poodle.

June's mama Velveeta told her daughter to simmer down before she destroyed the whole friggin house. "Mama" June said that she couldn't because her female hormones had taken over her entire feministic body and she was just itching all over with the wedding bell goose bumps.

According to Miss San Guacamole about 90 family members as well as friends and neighbors were in attendance.

Music was provided by local musician Jebby P. Dabadoo and His Magic Accordion.

After a wedding trip to Macon the couple will reside in their same home in McIntyre along with their three daughters, granddaughter, Mama Shannon's mama Velveeta, and all kinds of assorted pets.

SIDENOTE: When asked why the couple had decided to get married on Cinco de Mayo little Honey Boo Boo replied that it was in honor of Salma Hayek who is her mom's favorite movie star.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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