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Thursday, 18 April 2013

image for Lady Gaga accuses her rival Britney Spears of improprieties
The two, new helpers who sleep in bed with Lady Gaga.

Britney Spears ridiculed Lady Gaga because of her stinky breath only to anger Gaga who took revenge on Spears by exposing secrets she stole from Spears' private life.

The evidence is Gaga's own words: "Could you get it now and leak it to me? Thanks."

Doctors say they treated Lady Gaga for a yeast infection in her mouth which was causing the stinky breath. She got the yeast infection from performing cunnilingus on an old, fat, street prostitute in Milan while she was high and wasted. The next morning she was asking about her date, Danny, only to be told it was not a guy she was with.

Reportedly, in private, Gaga is referring to Spears as a "beast" because her kids have gay genes which came from her ex-husband Federline who was an openly gay dancer before meeting Spears.

"I got insider information that Jayden Federline, the first born son of Britney Spears' used to play with dolls when he was 6-years-old," said Gaga, breaking out in laughter.

In retaliation for what Gaga said about Jayden, Britney fired back in an interview with Gossip News saying that Gaga tore her Labrum because her genes are cheap since she was born that way. "Lady Gaga did a Monster Ball tour, so the world could see her Monster Balls," said Spears, laughing.

Gaga wrote on tweeter that Spears was born in a trailer park while her mother was washing laundry by hand and her mom noticed something had fallen out of her snatch only to realize later it was Britney Spears.

In a rage, Spears then fired back on the tonight show complaining that Gaga had abused her assistant, Jennifer O'Neill, by making her sleep in bed with her, so she could get masturbated for free while not paying overtime. "The Monster Queen was too lazy to bang herself, so she had O'Neill do it for her," said Spears, laughing.

There were no breaks for meals "or, at times, even sleep," and O'Neill was required to be on hand for anything the Monster Queen needed, at her "earliest waking hour" or for "spontaneous, random matters in the middle of the night like wiping Gaga's ass after she unloaded her stuff in the shitter," Spears said to a laughing crowd.

"She still smells like pig manure after having lived on a farm with her grandparents for so many years," said Gaga in an interview with Queer News.

Britney Spears is accusing Gaga of anything she can talk about, like Gaga wearing soiled underwear while singing on stage in a New York City concert because she couldn't take time off to use the bathroom. "The show must go on," said Spears, laughing.

At a later moment Spears exposed a secret conversation that Justin Bieber had with Usher where he told Usher that he would never date Lady Gaga because she had a new STD called "Herbies Trattoria" which is prevalent in canines. That explains why people don't want to have sex with the Monster.

The National Enquire reports that Lady Gaga admitted she had gathered private information detailing how Spears' mother had changed her diapers at 18-months-old, only to complain of the foul smell and hellish diaper rash. In an internet survey, Gaga's statement about Britney's diaper rash was found to be extremely funny.

With an evil smile on her face, Spears brought out information about another former personal assistant, Angela Ciemny, who was required to sleep with Gaga most nights because the needy diva refused to be alone and needed to be masturbated, according to the book "Poker Face: The Rise and Rise of Lady Gaga."

Ciemny, who had worked for Gaga in 2009, said she and the "Born This Way" singer sometimes did their makeup together and would even hop in the shower at the same time.

Entertainment guru, Geezer Hobbit, said that Britney Spears is more popular than Lady Gaga because people see her as the all American girl while they see Gaga as an Italian immigrant who is associated with gangs and crime.

All the criticism that Gaga has faced is due to the fact that she is considered a low class Italian immigrant.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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