Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Friday, 12 April 2013

image for American Idol Is Left With 5 Females As The Last Male Lazaro Arbos Is Eliminated
Lazaro will be returning to his home in Naples, Florida.

HOLLYWOOD - Well in a matter of one short hour American Idol suddenly became American Female Idol with the last male contestant Lazaro Arbos being eliminated thus leaving five females in the competition.

The Florida singer who never met a bright color of clothing that he did not like remarked that he felt he could have been in the Top 2, except for the fact that judge Randy "The Dawg" Jackson and AI record producer Jimmy "The Cricket" Iovine hammered him unmercifully week after week.

Comedian Zydeco Dupree commented that Louisiana native Jackson was especially brutal to Lazaro when he suggested that maybe he could get a job either modeling men's clothes or working as a security guard.

Nicki Minaj pretty much just sat at her seat looking like a dysfunctional Caribbean bobblehead doll.

Sitting next to Minaj, Keith Urban was busily texting his beautiful wife Nicole Kidman and Mariah Carey was playing with a container of glitter.

Dupree added that a lot of the American Idol viewers have tweeted that they are tired of Randy's overused phrases, "Ryan she's in it, to win it!" and "Yo, she's back y'all!"

Meanwhile, Woody The Wonder Woodchuck correctly predicted that Amber Holcomb and Janelle Arthur would be safe and that Lazaro would be going home. Woody's season record now stands at 21-3.

BEHIND THE SCENES: After the show Lazaro went up to Jimmy Iovine and told him that he looked absolutely stupid in his baseball cap. He then told Randy that if he put on some lipstick he would look exactly like Aretha Franklin except a whole lot more feminine.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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