Written by DP Whitehead
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Topics: Taylor Swift

Wednesday, 6 March 2013

image for Taylor Swift Breaks Up With Herself
Piled High In Her Kitchen - Taylor Had No Choice But To End This Relationship

Taylor swift has sensationally broken up with herself telling friends and family "That's it, we are done, it is over, we are never, EVER, getting back together!"

The break up has come as a surprise to many but for some it seems it is a regular occurrence for the 23 year old warbler.

Reports suggest that Swift called time on her relationship with herself after an incident involving a dirty coffee cup.

She allegedly told friends "I made myself a cup of coffee to drink in bed and after I drank it I left it on my bedside cabinet. Well, three days later it was still there! I hadn't even bothered to take back downstairs, let alone rinse it and put it in the dishwasher. I simply can not put up with laziness and such inconsideration. This of course comes after I didn't put the toilet seat down after using the bathroom, don't I realize that there is not just me in this relationship?"

Swift sent a text message to herself informing her of the break up.

"As of yet I haven't replied, so I guess I got the message," she chirped.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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